Gender Balancing
Gender Balancing
An Evolutionary Model for Elevating Relationships from Mediocre to EXTRAORDINARY
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"This practical book will make an impact on every one of your relationships. Martin is an extraordinary coach who is in constant demand."

-Harvey W. Austin, MD, surgeon and author

Gender Balancing: An Evolutionary Model for Elevating Relationships from Mediocre to EXTRAORDINARY shows you how to create a balanced and fulfilling relationship. As a renowned relationship coach, I have helped thousands of people find and enhance their love relationships. Now my book will guide you as you learn to create your own extraordinary relationship.

The steps are easy and doable. You will learn to observe, identify, and balance the feminine and masculine energies within you to empower your relationships with others-and yourself. The discovery of what women and men want and need from each other will surprise and enlighten you. You will discover the five primary relationships and see how you can build on family, friendship, romance, and committed relationships to create an everlasting relationship-one that inspires others.

Throughout the book, simple concepts are illustrated along with fascinating client stories. I have worked with thousands of people. I have watched as women and men have evolved from lonely or bored, taking themselves and their relationships from mediocre to extraordinary. Now it's your turn.

Humanity has work to do before we transcend gender bias. Extraordinary relationships will one day be established as the new norm. In the meantime, why not get a head start on your own transformation? Throughout the process, I will be there to encourage and support you.

In order to be in a healthy relationship, it is essential to understand what the other person might expect or desire from you.

This may sound simple, but you would be surprised at how many people just do not understand this.

Although every individual is different, there are four major principles regarding what women and men require from each other. We will first look at what women want and need, then at what men want and need.

What Women Want and Need from Men

1. To Be Fun

The fun that men may innately embody has a childlike quality. It is fundamentally light, carefree, naïve, and in the moment. This kind of fun is uncomplicated and unhindered by thought, and it contains an adorable quality that goes beyond what could be planned or intentional. For many women, being with a man like this can be a breath of fresh air. It is also grounding, as in its presence, women need not think about anything other than enjoying, appreciating, and laughing. This could be considered the antithesis of how a woman's mind tends to work.

2. To Be Certain and Clear

Certainty and clarity are often significant challenges for men because they tend not to be able to provide them. To meet expectations, a man would have to address a woman with a concise, powerful approach that is not dominating or aggressive. When opinions or directions are spoken with certainty and clarity within the context of love and respect, the woman is relieved of the pressure to analyze. She is empowered not to have to take the lead.

3. To Perform the Role of Lover and Generator

A woman may dream of being pursued and loved by a man who is a hopeless romantic, generating in her the love and intimacy she wants him to want as well. His pursuit is physical, intentional, and filled with words of everlasting love. The woman's capacity to receive love is infinite; the man's role is to fulfill as much of that as possible.

4. To Be Profoundly Respectful: The Context

It is essential for men to uphold profound respect at all times in a relationship with a beloved woman. Profound respect directly correlates to the woman's experience of being loved completely. Profound respect deeply honors the woman in all aspects, situations, and scenarios from opening her door to smiling at her to acknowledging her. This kind of respect borders on a reverence that speaks to her as a remarkable woman, resource, treasure, and possibly mother and friend. What is essential inside of this profound respect is the total willingness to extend oneself as a privilege.

What Men Want and Need from Women

1. To Be Safe

The principal of safety is essential in creating a successful, powerful, and happy long-standing relationship. This requires a woman to know that the man is different and is not her. Thus, the woman's intention would be to create the possibility for the man to be totally himself in all ways possible. This includes his greatness and the child within him, his brilliance, his simplicity, his creativity, his foolishness and his young soul, that which a woman may love, and that which seems so illogical, making no sense whatsoever.

For the man to regard the woman as "safe," she must create space for him to be who he is. Doing so is an altruistic gift the woman simultaneously gives to herself and to him. This gift will give rise to countless and perhaps infinite realized possibilities beyond logical comprehension. The woman's courage comes in the face of the awareness that there is no guarantee about the couple's future together. Being safe demonstrates a woman's unconditional love and her commitment to creating an extraordinary relationship.

2. To Be Visionary

A woman exercising her innate ability to envision the future in the best way possible makes a man happy. A woman has the capacity and creativity to create a picture that allows the man to see the future now. From the man's perspective, this borders on psychic. Most men cannot do this, many women can. This vision allows the woman to cause a future that previously did not seem possible. This futuristic gift is natural to the essence of who women tend to be. What is required of the woman is to give herself permission to look deeply and to trust her timeless existence, so that she can express what she sees that brings the future to life.

This visionary muscle, fully exercised and spoken, is magically potent. When accompanied by actions, conversations, and structure to fulfill that vision, the result is an aligned vision that leaves an inspirational impact and creates a legacy to live into.

3. To Be Fulfilled and Complete as a Woman

There is no register or litmus test measuring the degree that you may love and respect yourself. However, you may not have adequate love and respect for yourself at all times. If you look deeply, there are times when love and respect for yourself is virtually nonexistent.

Women more often than men tend to lack adequate self-love and respect. However, note that being fulfilled and complete as a woman will take her out of the game when it comes to being attached to having a committed relationship. She will no longer be attached to the assumption that she must be in a committed relationship with a man. Not being attached allows her the freedom to powerfully choose to be or not to be in a relationship. This does not mean, though, that she does not love and appreciate being in relationship.

It is essential for women to be responsibly conscious that they possess the indomitable right to choose. Women can choose to be in a committed relationship or not. If she does choose to be in a committed relationship and is already fulfilled and complete as a woman, she will instantly create a demand for her from the man. He will pursue and love her as the woman of his choice.

4. To Give Authentic Acknowledgment: The Context

Building and creating inside the physical universe is an omnipotent exercise. Creating something from nothing is not easy. It may require physical effort, an art, and a skill, as well as the intention to bring to life a tangible creation. Building and creating can require overcoming limitations and what may appear to be insurmountable challenges.

When a man is building, it is essential for the woman to authentically acknowledge what he creates as a completion and as an impetus to live into a new future. The woman's honest acknowledgment speaks to the man through a loving approach that powerfully supports all he has created and all that he is committed to building; it makes his unique contribution worthwhile. When this happens, women and men are equally empowered within the relationship.

When a woman and man provide what they want and need from each other fully, their relationship will move beyond mediocre to extraordinary. Each partner has an overall experience of her or his own greatness, having it all with nothing left out or missing. I have seen this happen countless times. It really works.

Martin Cohen is a professional coach and relationship expert who partners with committed individuals, empowering them to achieve unprecedented levels of success, happiness, and satisfaction in their lives. Known as the "Guru of Gender Balancing," Martin has led programs for thousands of women and men. His unique style and delivery causes breakthroughs for people looking to deeply understand the differences among women and men. Martin is happily married over thirty years and has five children.



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